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How the Cold Gloom Proves Global Warming (That We All Casually Ignore)

Posted on February 16, 2025

Britain. Where we spend our summers complaining it’s too hot and our winters moaning that it’s too cold—except, apparently, when it isn’t cold enough. Right now, the Met Office is cheerfully telling us that the recent chilly spell is about to be swept away by an Atlantic airflow. No more biting easterlies. No more potential for snow. But here’s the weird thing. This so-called cold snap hasn’t really been that cold. By all rights, ...

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Why Do England Struggle in Group Stages at Major Tournaments?

Posted on June 26, 2024

As a chez lounge supporter of the England football team, it’s both perplexing and, let’s be honest, occasionally bloody annoying to watch the squad’s recurring struggles against teams that the tabloids label as "minnows" during major tournaments. I have attempted to look what's behind this phenomenon, whilst trying to keep my sense of moderate optimism intact (what else can we do when the football appears to be so lacklustre?). Psych...

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Angela Rayner’s Checkout Catastrophe Resurfaces

Posted on April 10, 2024

In a bombshell revelation shaking the foundations of British politics, it has emerged that Labour stalwart, Angela Rayner, committed a checkout faux 15 years ago at a Tesco store in Lancashire. The long-buried incident, now brought to light, details how Rayner, then a humble shopper, brazenly attempted to slide through ELEVEN items at a "ten items or less" checkout lane. Linda McCartney Pie Shockingly the extra item was a solitary Linda ...

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Living Life in a Soundbar Paradise

Posted on March 31, 2024

So, feeling a tad guilty (and quite peeved) about my Amazon addiction, I recently vowed to re-embrace the brick-and-mortar shopping experience. Cue my adventure at Currry's for a new soundbar, because apparently, I'm now a real-life retail explorer again. I walked in, got escorted to the soundbar section by an actual human, and was promised a salesman shortly. But alas, stock was as scarce as humble politicians, yet I picked one out eventually ...

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Will it Ever Stop Raining?

Posted on March 27, 2024

I’m starting to panic about the rain never stopping. Are we in a permanent state of wetness courtesy of global warming? The records just keep tumbling. In the past year, it feels like we've seen more rain than a tropical rainforest during monsoon season. The jet stream seems to have taken up permanent residence above our heads, treating us to an endless barrage of downpours. A look ahead offers no respite. More rain and no dry spell in ...

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