Down at the Doctors!
Posted on November 2, 2017
I don’t like the doctors, so I avoid them when I can, partly because my mother brought us up to only visit a GP if we were carrying one of our own severed limbs and then only if our own attempts at stitching it back on had failed.
I only turned up today because I was speaking to an electrician who works for me the other day and he panicked me somewhat. He is 49 (the same age as me) and on a recent check-up he discovered his blood pressure was about to blow and he was immediately put on stabilising medication and a dietary and exercise programme.
“It’s a silent killer Bob” he said to me in a harrowing voice.
What did I do? Well, I metaphorically shat myself of course, instantly booking an appointment with the doctor, remembering that is was ‘the silent killer’ that polished off my mother.
So, I arrived at the surgery and was greeted with a feeling that I could only liken to walking into a strange pub, of which there are plenty down here near Andover. Everyone seemed to know I wasn’t a regular and I appeared to walking into a social event where everyone knew each other.
I was genuinely waiting for someone to say “This is our surgery mate, fuck off”.
Anyway, eventually the landlord, sorry, I mean the doctor, came out and greeted me for my 4:20 PM death sentence.
He looked like an exhausted 12 year old and I couldn’t help but wonder what sort of day he had as he carried an air of relief about him that suggested giving a blood pressure check to a nervous 49 year old was the highlight of his day.
The results were good, with the blood pressure coming in at 130/90 which is apparently pretty solid and I left happy with a just minor warning to keep an eye on the body mass (i.e. try not to become a fat bastard).
Little did he know that my girlfriend is already on this, checking my glove compartment and shopping receipts for anything with Maynards or Haribo written on them. Asking her to take control of my diet was a mistake; it is like dating an over zealous FBI agent.
I left behind me a packed waiting room that was getting in the late appointments before last orders and went on my way, hoping not to be back too soon. It reminded me of something I read the other day about needless appointments costing the NHS £306 million per annum and prescription fraud costing it over a billion.
The NHS is a great institution but it appears that as well as chronic underfunding and the desperation to sell it off to non dom plutocrats, there is a severe lack of education about services free at the point of delivery. It appears that some people resort to the doctor at the drop of a hat whilst others just see it as something to be used for a bit of attention and drama (I have known people like that, it infuriates me).
So rather than filling up kids heads about mythical religious figures that the enlightenment have long proved to be about as genuine as the tooth fairy, why not dedicate an hour a week on the education curriculum to learning about free healthcare and what it costs to administer per appointments/prescription etc. etc.
This would not stop people using the service but it might educate them enough to think twice about turning up at a GP practice with a runny nose. It may also arrest the pointless use of antibiotics that are becoming less resistant due to overuse.
Of course, the problems run deeper than that with the NHS but and education about something that sees you through life from womb to grave is surely more important than something that all evidence suggest, doesn’t even exist.
If parents want to indulge their kids in religion, they can do so at the local church, mosque or synagogue.
Just an idea.