British People and a Referendum…Oh God!

Posted on May 26, 2015

I heard something on the radio the other day that staggered me so much with its bleeding obvious content I nearly veered off the road.

Basically, it was a study carried out on behalf of the BMA that suggested adults are more likely to increase their alcohol intake whilst they are on holiday or attending celebrations such as weddings or birthday parties.

I instantly imagined the scene in the laboratory of some university.

“Professor, come quickly and look at these graphs coming up on the computer from our recent survey.” 

“Okay I’m coming Charlie, but it better be good, I’m a busy man, I’m doing a study to see if smoking 100 cigarettes a day makes you run slower.”

A stunned silence then takes place as the professor digests the information on the tax funded super computer, bought at full retail price from a slick salesman from IBM.

“Are you trying to say Charlie…that…adults…drink more alcohol on holiday and at parties?”

“Look at the graph professor, the evidence is compelling.”

Good Lord you are right…organise a press release this instant…the British public need to be aware of this epidemic.”

Next they will be saying that if you eat five jam doughnuts a day you are likely to get diabetes.

This statement got me wondering just how stupid the Government think the masses are that they need to be perpetually bombarded with this type of medical information…then it got me wondering if the public really are that thick.

Do people digest this kind of information, panic, and instantly reassess their behaviour?

“Darling, I’m home…please sit down…we need to talk.”

“What is it Albert…what’s wrong…good God…please no…Please don’t tell me you are having an affair with Jade from the office?”

“No I am not having affair Chantelle…Do you remember last month…we went to Kylie and Norman’s wedding?”

“Yes, I remember Albert…why…what is it?”

“Chantelle…I…I…I…think we might have drunk more alcohol than we normally do, a survey has shown we almost certainly did.”


“Stop it Chantelle you’re not going to die…now get your tracksuit on, I’m taking you to KFC to cheer you up.”

I don’t really know how stupid people are but judging by the magazines and tabloid headlines I see in shops and the utter drivel that emanates from television screens, I am going to assume that there are a lot of people about with heads filled with nothing but celebrity gossip, fantasy long range weather forecasts from the Daily Express, football transfer news, and casual racism. 

A conspiracy theorist would argue that the best way for Government’s and financial institutions to continue with corruption is to keep them at bay with gossip, sport, the national lottery and general junk culture and is hard to argue against that theory, especially if you are like me and you choose to be nosey and listen in on the conversations of others in pubs, bars or restaurants.

I went to an Indian restaurant last night with my girlfriend and the utter diatribe the two couples next to us were coming out with beggared belief. There was a dash of homophobia, a section on Chelsea F.C’s parade through London, and some deliberately over the top belching chucked in with the other vitriolic nonsense that was coming backwards and forwards from the two morbidly obese women.

I know it doesn’t really matter what people want to do with their lives or what they gossip about but when I hear a Newcastle United fan talk about the demise of his football club as if there has been an outbreak of the Bubonic Plague, it really is up to me to just turn the TV off and do something better. I get that, I really do.

However, what scares me is that in 2017, Britain’s future is in the hands of these type people when we have an EU referendum. They might know what Victoria and David Beckham’s kitchen looks like, but I am going to hedge my bets here and state that they are incapable of understanding the fiscal advantages and disadvantage of the EU.  

What are politicians playing at by having a referendum?

As most of you know, I have always been a centre left socialist, if there is such a thing, however, at the election the other week one of my main reasons for voting Labour was their policy not to get involved in an EU Referendum.

The Conservatives have done, despite their leader, David Cameron, being essentially pro-Europe with his recent speech making a strong case for Europe, for the EU single market, for Britain as a European power, and even for deeper integration in the Eurozone.


David Cameron: Referendum Nightmares

They had no choice to agree to a referendum I guess, as we are a nation of anti-European tabloids, where Europhobia infiltrates Tory backbenchers, and sits firmly in the rise of UKIP (5 million voters in total) which could have looked substantially more dramatic with an alternative voting system.

Because I have a job, a family, a girlfriend, a social life and a time-consuming hobby (cricket) I haven’t really got the time to study the pros and cons of EU Membership, so what I do when I go to the voting booth, is tick the box of the party I feel are most responsible with regards to a subject that is critical to our financial future. We vote for them and it is then up to them to negotiate the best deal for Britain as an EU member.

The reason I say as a member, is because, from virtually every sensible article I have read, the consequences of a Brexit, and becoming ‘Little Britain’ are at best, fiscally risky, especially if an exit was taking place in a country led by people who collect clowns and down pints of Spitfire in their mustard trousers whilst bleating on about a perceived golden era before all them there bloody foreigners came over.

As I write, David Cameron is getting in a terrible pickle as he tries to renegotiate a better deal for the UK in the EU and according to most press sources he is getting constantly side stepped by Germany and France, leading to a situation where Britain’s continued membership is on a knife-edge.

Whilst Cameron and Osborne are centre right politicians who believe in staying in a reformed EU, the Conservative Party is full of old farts who are largely against membership and they will be ravenous at his failure to re-negotiate…but the worst bit is that now he (Cameron) has promised the electorate a referendum, Britain may well be bombing out of Europe against the wishes of an elected Prime Minister.

One presumes the five million who voted UKIP will vote for a Brexit along with millions of Tories and the type of people I mentioned earlier in this post. You can almost imagine the moment the reality struck home in the Cameron household the morning after the election.

“Gosh Samantha, what a party last night, I still can’t believe we won…I feel ruddy woozy today, in fact I’m going to ask the BMA to conduct a study to see if we drink more at parties as I am sure we do.”

“David…you promised a referendum in 2017 didn’t you?”


When we vote for a party, we should do it so politicians can engage with economists and fiscal analysts to ensure that we are in the best financial position possible. We shouldn’t vote for a Government who then ask us to vote YES or NO to something 90% of country know nothing about and stick their vote in the box purely for purposes of crack-pot racism.

That’s like saying “I know you voted for us, but you know this EU thingy, we just can’t work it all out…what do you reckon?”

 No sooner than the ticker-tape had settled and the celebratory speeches ended, it must have started dawning on David Cameron that he and his trusted Chancellor are about to walk in to a political nightmare. 

So could Britain’s economy.

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