Johnson the Clown on His Way to a Majority

Posted on November 29, 2019

A week is a long time in politics and it certainly feels like it.

What I think I have learnt is that Boris Johnson could eat one of the Queen’s Corgis and get away with it.

Perennial fuckwit, Prince Andrew, has been taking all the public rap for being an unsavoury scallywag of high ranking, yet everything has bounced off of Johnson, our delightful new PM.

That said, I have spoken to two Tories this week and they are claiming they are not going to vote for him. However, don’t take two people I happen to know as some sort of exciting BobGov poll. They may just have been trying to pacify me.

One of them is a chap I know through youth football. He is a decent enough bloke; picture him if you can. He wears blue suede shoes whatever the weather, has a head like he uses vintage port for face cream and possesses a collection of cars that would make a Premier League footballer blush.

The only thing missing, is ‘I VOTE TORY’ stamped on his forehead, yet he told me he detests Brexit and Johnson. He says he will be voting voting either Lib Dem, or for an equivalent of The Monster raving Loony Party. One thing I can tolerate about him is that I can at least understand how he came to be a Tory and at least he hates Johnson.

The other is a more centrist chap I know through business. A Conservative with a small ‘c’ who admires Tory intellects like Dominic Grieve and Max Hastings. He describes Johnson as a fat slob who has turned the party into a spiteful right-wing cult. Hardly a ringing endorsement.

However, none of them would contemplate voting Labour, so you must wonder what would happen if the election got close. Would they really allow Corbyn in through the back door by voting against Johnson? I have my doubts.

That’s the problem with Corbyn. People may be turned off the Tories, but they aren’t swinging over to the Labour Party. Well, not according to recent BobGov polling anyway. However, it might create anomalies with polling that could mean this is not as cut and dried as most sane folk think.

Another blow for Corbyn appears to be that some self-flagellating traditional Labour voters are prepared to vote for Johnson if they can get a Brexit that will make their lives worse. How the Labour party solve that conundrum is beyond me. What can they do about that?

I have no answers because when people double down, you would have more success turning around the QE2 on the Basingstoke Canal. They are like those people who bought currency from the missing Krypto Queen (Ruja Ignatova) and still think they are loaded.

The fat lady isn’t singing yet but Johnson, a man entirely unfit for high office must be hear her backstage, clearing her throat.

Only he can fuck this up.

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